Time Warp Fiber

I'm afraid today's post will disappoint the photo-hungry. I would photograph the mohair shawl, but it's too depressing. Despite diligently knitting thousands of stitches, to the utter neglect of all other yarny pursuits, I swear that damn thing hasn't grown. I did, however, reach a design decision. I know it's supposed to the the Feather and Fan Triangle, from Folk Shawls . (Fantastic book, btw, lovely shawl designs that aren't so intricate as to cause twitching in the knitter) However, I've decided to omit the Feather and Fan bit, and just stick with the triangle. There are a few reasons for this. I'm not sure how much I like the scalloped edge, it's a little too frilly for me. Also, by my standards, the yarn is rather busy, and I don't want anything to compete with the very lovely, and very pricey, hand painted mohair. And I admit having an aversion to purling over 400 sts every fourth row.

But really the main point is wearability. I knit largely for the process, but I do like wearing my handknits. And since I'm the boss of my knitting, I'm going to do everything I can to make sure I knit the best garment for me, or whoever the intended is. The way I see it, there are precious few off-the-rack garments out there that make an actual woman look and feel good. If said woman happens to be above a size 6, the number drops tremendously. Throw in curves, and it's almost hopeless. One of the reasons I design is so that I can dress my body, with all its curves, to some kind of advantage. Part of this is my coping with having gained more weight than I would like in recent years, and trying my very hardest to love my body now, not whenever 'the weight' comes off, as that's no way to live.

I had a moment of revelation, albeit a small one, sitting outside the ice cream shop across the street from my apartment in the Marina. I love people watching, and even more so than usual in LA, which has far more than the requisite number of beautiful women. Lots of them wear shawls, as the weather right on the coast lends itself very well to shawls when the breeze rolls through the cool evenings. Anyway, I was sitting with Butthead and watching the people go by, including some very fabulous ladies draped elegantly in shawls. And I thought, I wish I could pull that off. On the heels of that, damn it, why not. No, I'm not 5'10" with long legs and innate grace, but there's no reason I shouldn't be able to feel that elegant when draped in a shawl I've labored to create. I have a tendency to dress very drably, to draw  into the background and draw no attention to the body I often feel at odds with. So as a step forward, I make a commitment to design and knit things that will make me feel good, on whatever level. The means knitting shawls large enough to reach around my bust and sweaters that won't house a circus. I'm not a size six teenager, and I don't have to be. And until I can feel quite so elegant as those ladies outside the shop, I'm at least going to pretend. I'll be the one furtively checking the drape of my shawl in the shop windows, if it ever gets done, that is.